Excuse Me, Do You Mind Turning That Thing Off?

Last night I went to the movies with a friend to watch The Help. I had read the book several weeks ago and had anxiously been awaiting the day I get to see it. (Btw-- It was really good!)

While I am in the movie my husband texts me. (My phone is on silent so it only vibrates on my leg.) I look and he asks "What time did the movie start and are you still there?" Seriously? I have been away from the house for less than 2 hours and I am being interrupted by these questions? (I felt like a woman who is having an affair!) And they continue, "Hello?" "You there?" and so forth. The only reason I even keep my phone near is because I do have a small kid and I would think (hope) that if my husband would text me in case of an emergency. About the time I go to text my husband back to tell him to please stop texting me so I can watch my movie the man next to me (there was a seat between us) very loudly states "Could you respect those around you and turn that off!" I am so embarrassed and honestly quite mad not just at my husband but at this man who very rudely announced to the entire place that I am bothering him. I am positive he could have leaned over quietly and said "Your phone's light is bothering me. Do you mind to put it away?" and I would have been so understanding. (Remember, I did not ask to get the third degree in the first place.)

So now I am zoned way out of movie mode. I am frustrated, embarrassed and down right mad. Mad at the rude man (I know in his mind I was the rude one but clearly he had a choice on how to handle the situation and involving the entire theater was not the way I would have picked) and mad at my husband for asking me stupid questions during a time I was trying to enjoy some me time which ultimately put me in the situation. To my husband's defense, he didn't know I was going to get yelled at and if I had not my anger would probably not have been as elevated but it did and it was. (Let me give an example: Your kid steals your car, and you are mad. But how much more upset are you when they wreck it?)

I could have probably swallowed my pride and taken my lashing in the theater and deemed responsibility for all blame except for the next few moments. After it is over and people have finally quit looking at me the man (let's call him the rude man) and his wife are having a disagreement. Apparently she was not happy with the way he handled it either and so he is whispering argumentatively with her until the says (directing theater attention on me again) "She is the one who comes to the movies and sits on her phone talking to her friends. If she wanted to talk to her friends don't come to the theater." Really? I just wanted to look at him and say "Why are you being such a jerk?" Instead, I lean over and whisper "I am sorry. It was my husband and I thought it might be about my son." Very loudly again he says "IT SAYS TO TURN THEM OFF! TURN IT OFF!!!" Now the entire place is clearly not watching the movie and my poor friend is sure we are getting kicked out. I am soooooo embarrassed but mad too! I said "I put it away." He spouts "TURN IT OFF!" His wife is yanking his arm telling him to be quiet. I think my friend has moved away from me now (thanks for having my back--lol). Did I mention that my phone has been on silent already through out this entire altercation. No sound has come out of it at any time. So it being on the floor, in my purse, on silent should be more than enough for this man. But control freak rude man wanted it off. He did not get his way. He may be the boss of his house but not mine. (Mine is texting me asking for my timeline.)

After the movie, my friend uses the bathroom and I see rude man in the lobby. (I am currently trying to call my husband to take my frustration out on him.) The man's wife is needing to use the bathroom and I hear him say, firmly and rudely "Hurry up, I don't like sitting in traffic." Traffic, in Festus movie theater... ok! Apparently he is just a rude man.

Funny thing is while I was sitting in the theater I kept praying to myself "God, please calm my anger and relax my nerves" and then in the next breath my alter-ego would cut in and say "Forget calming my nerves, that guy is a jerk!" Back and forth I am having this personal struggle within me all while I am at the movie. I had a lot going on during that movie.

Of course my conversation with the hubby was not a huge success because I had caught rude man's ass disease and it came through on the phone so I had to later apologize. I apologize because I was wrong and should not have been as rude as I was about the whole situation. But this is what I love about arguments between married people. Obviously when 2 sides are arguing there is a reason. However, one side always takes it to the point of over board (my side in this convo) and they end up apologizing. But the truth of the matter is that we were arguing over something else entirely and you got off scott free. So my husband walks away scar free and blameless for the asking my every move because I yelled at him for me getting yelled at. And all married people whom have had this type of argument know that to bring it up later (to still try and get your apology) is crazy talk because the will think you are begging for a fight and that you can not let anything go. Because of this, you go down without a fight and take blame, again.

Today, I wake up still aggravated. (I guess the devil side one and no nerves were calmed.) The hubby calls and is griping (actually he could have just been talking but in my frame of mind it felt like griping) and I finally tell him I am not in the mood to listen to being griped at so could we please end this conversation. He is very ticked now (with every right) and hangs up. An hour later he sends me a text apologizing. (My husband NEVER apologizes. Especially when I am wrong.) He states that he didn't mean to come across that way but understands that it did and he is sorry. As I read it my mouth drops. All I can say at this point is "I am sorry too. and Thank you!" Now who is the jerk! (ME!!!)

So I am going to try to be more patient with my husband because it could be worse, I could be married to rude man!